As it became clear that my company, Revolution Messaging, was out of options, I couldn’t stop thinking about John Kerry. The 2004 election was a formative experience for me. I’ll never forget elating over the leaked “exit polling” data that spread across the Internet like wildfire—or how my hopes came crashing down as the first actual vote tallies started coming in from Florida.
The week after that election, I was eating lunch at a Chinese restaurant on Capitol Hill when Senator Kerry and some staffers walked in and sat down. You could feel people distancing themselves, avoiding sitting next to him or even approaching him. This was a man we thought would be the president just a week earlier. Suddenly, no one wanted to be seen with him.
Fear of that kind of fate came crashing over me as I realized that relaunching my political agency, now a distressed asset, would be impossible. What came next was the worst and best thing that ever happened to me—and it’s why this magazine is in your hands today.
Before we go any further: The story I’m about to tell is about mental health and suicidal ideation. If you might find that triggering, head to the end of my story, which focuses on the future.